The Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by R!f@@, Oct 8, 2011.

  1. cmartinez

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  2. Tonyr1084

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    THE CHICKEN and THE EGG were laying in bed. The chicken sitting up against the headboard smoking a cigarette, the egg, somewhat upset. The egg grabs the covers, pulls them up and rolls over. The chicken asks "What's the matter with you?" To which the egg replies "Well, I guess we answered THAT age old question!"

    [edit] @cmartinez What happened to the one leg the guy cut off his frog? Where'd he put it?
     
  3. Tonyr1084

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    Blond woman says to her boyfriend "For my birthday I've decided I want a milk bath. I've never had a milk bath and I want one." Her boyfriend, somewhat unable to wrap his head around the whole idea reluctantly says "OK. You want that Pasteurized?" To which she responds "No silly. Just up to my chin."

    Memory of that one inspired by the blond in cmartinez's cartoon.
     
  4. cmartinez

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  5. Tonyr1084

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    It's sad this is the next generation rule the world.
     
  6. justtrying

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    I wouldnt base it on this video. This is a proof of concept experiment. Some stories i hear from my father, i am surprised I was born...
     
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  7. cmartinez

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    o_O How's he like?
     
  8. Tonyr1084

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    I've done plenty of stupid stuff in my day. Built a supercharger for my minibike. We SWEAR it was faster, but it probably wasn't. Those Briggs & Scrapiron motors were only good for around 3500 RPM at the most. But the one truly stupid thing I did was to build a rocket motor in my back yard once. And it was impressive. Worked ONCE. Never worked again and us boys never figured it out. We sat no more than 3 feet away when we fired it off. It was inverted so it never flew. But it could have exploded. And that would have hurt like hell. Still, I've never injured myself; not like that. Beer, alcohol or gasoline, that kid did not belong on a motorbike. Period. And that's what is scary, the idea that such kids who have absolutely no sense in what they're doing are going to one day be adults making adult decisions.

    OK, I grew out of my stupid phase. I think. - - - Yeah, I think I did. Nevertheless, I still have to deal with people who know 10% of what they should know and refuse to listen to anyone with greater knowledge, wisdom or experience, thinking that they know ALL there is to know about a subject. There's no arguing with them and there's no appeasing them. You just have to endure it.

    I'm glad I'm old enough to not have to worry about where the world is going to be in 15 years. 10 years scares me a little. The next four years are shaping up to be rather frightful as well. Depends on who's elected. But you can't change the course of a river - and you can't fix stupid.
     
    Last edited: Jul 12, 2019
  9. shortbus

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    But you can vote it out of office.
     
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  10. MrChips

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    Yeah, I built a rocket with a 35mm film can filled with gun powder.:rolleyes:
    We took the precaution of hiding behind a concrete post after lighting the fuse, just in case something went wrong.:)
    Good thing we did.:D
     
  11. SamR

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    If it weren't for stupidity we wouldn't have anything to compare smart to.
     
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  12. djsfantasi

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    My stupid act was to “borrow” the chemical supply room key in school, and make a small batch of thermite and added powdered aluminum. That wasn’t the stupid thing. The stupid thing was when we lit it.
     
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  13. iimagine

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    If it werent for some daring or were called stupid people back in the day, there would be no airplane.
     
  14. cmartinez

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    When I was a teen, I loved to build tennis ball bazookas using three cans of beer (using cans of soda was for sissies) taped together in tandem. Then I'd add gasoline and fire them with a kitchen lighter ... the ball would fly out the length of several football fields, it was quite a sight ... if I was lucky enough for the whole assembly not to explode in my hands, which happened several times ...
     
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  15. MaxHeadRoom

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    A Pepsi Canon, we used lighter fluid, but same result.:cool:
    Max.
     
  16. djsfantasi

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  17. cmartinez

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    In my case, it was a Miller Canon... :cool:
    :p
     
  18. djsfantasi

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    I was in Atlanta. So it was a Coke cannon. (CocaCola is headquartered in Atlanta). We used cologne as a fuel. We used Hai Karate, a particularly obnoxious cologne that was popular at the time. You usually got 3-4 bottles at Christmas from your parents, grand-parents and a mish-mosh of older uncles and aunts.
     
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  19. SamR

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    Oh the trouble I could get into with a gross count box of M-80s or Cherry Bombs. Not the wimpy things they sell now but the real deal back before they were outlawed. Probably why I'm half deaf now but at least I kept all my fingers intact.
     
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  20. Tonyr1084

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    Made a giant kite one day. Had to hold it down with a rope tied to a tree. Took us hours to get it back down. Today they call them hang gliders.
     
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