Your business is your baby, your child. And as such, it demands your attention on a schedule other than what is considered normal. Your the employee, the accountant, the stock boy, the cleanup crew, the runner, and lucky if you worked 9-5 accomplishing all that was needed to do.

Your productivity (time the business is earning money) was 100 percent, you would be hiring someone to help you out. After all, your five people plus the boss, and the six of you are getting dam tired of people complaining about you working "normal" hours.

If you start at the "crack of noon", it's probably because you've been up most of the night earning the money you didn't earn from 9 to 5.

 

And speaking of ouch... I'm not sure if this is believable or not... but here it goes:

​

 

If you start at the "crack of noon", it's probably because you've been up most of the night earning the money you didn't earn from 9 to 5.

no argument there...

 

And speaking of ouch... I'm not sure if this is believable or not... but here it goes:

It's believable. It's ROFL...except it's horribly dangerous.

You should paint over the Road Runner with a toll booth and a toll collector in a uniform. Add a nice toll gate like a two by four painted with black and yellow stripes.

 

 

It made me laugh...

 

 

 

blonde does some photocopying

then checks the copies against the original for spelling mistakes

---

a boy whispers to his mom at a wedding, 'why's the girl dressed in white?'
mom replies ' its because its the happiest day of her life'
the boy then asks, 'why is the boy in black?'

---

mom never saw the irony of calling me a son-of-a-b*tch

---

a man called a hotel, 'how much for a room?'
the clerk said 'that depends on the size of the room'
the man asks ' do you take children?'
the clerk replies ' no sir, only cash and credit cards...'

 

'why's the [bride] dressed in white?'

So she matches the fridge and the dishwasher?

 

​

 

Clever Signs

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."
On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
At an Optometrist's Office :"If you don't see what you're looking for,
you've come to the right place."
On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."
On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."
In a Non-smoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push."
At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
Outside a Muffler Shop : "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
At the Electric Company "We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, YOU will be delighted."
In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."
In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."
At a Propane Filling Station: "Thank heaven for little grills."
CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP: "Best place in town to take a leak."
And the best one for last... Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck: "Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"
And this I remember from years ago : " Why go to town to be swindled, shop here."

 

CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP: "Best place in town to take a leak."

That was Lamy's Radiator Shop in St. Petersburg, Florida.

 

Barber Shop: Best clip joint in town.

 

In Destin, Florida, the other day, there was a bumper sticker on a parked car that read: "I miss Chicago."

Someone broke the window, stole the radio, shot out all four of the tires, added an Obama bumper sticker and left a note that read, "Hope this helps."

 

​

 

 

I just saw that one on facebook about 10 minutes ago

 

‪#‎Christmas‬‪#‎gift‬ in Beijing (By Luo Jie / Chinadaily)



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