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What are those complaints That you find a 500-year-old woman named Mona to be hot?
Failure by position.
The Jokes thread
- Thread starter R!f@@
- Start date
GopherT: Failure by existence.
Some days I wish you were right but, no matter what I do, I just keep winning.
My oldman used to have a saying about this, " wish in one hand and sh!t in the other, see which one gets full first".
djsfantasi
- Joined Apr 11, 2010
- 9,237
Me: Do you know what Murphy's Law is?
You: If anything can go wrong, it will go wrong.
Me: Do you know what Cole's Law is?
You: I haven't heard that one...
You: If anything can go wrong, it will go wrong.
Me: Do you know what Cole's Law is?
You: I haven't heard that one...
Me: (in a squeaky voice) Very very thinly sliced cabbage!
MaxHeadRoom
- Joined Jul 18, 2013
- 30,661
I heard they ran into an impedance of some kind!
Max.
Max.
I am highly resistant to this kind of humor.I heard they ran into an impedance of some kind!
Max.
MaxHeadRoom
- Joined Jul 18, 2013
- 30,661
Wanna bit the shift out of these funny guys? ... Stand in linear...
Nothing like binary thinking.
You know that really hertz.
A man's wife goes into labor. He gets the wife in the car. A short time later the car breaks down. Nothing can be worse than this! Nothing can be worse than this says the man.
He happens to have a bicycle in the trunk. He gets the wife on the bicycle and a few blocks down the street the bicycle gets a flat. Nothing can be worse than this! Nothing can be worse than this says the man.
The man scoops up his wife and carries her on his back. Just before reaching the hospital doors he trips and falls. Nothing can be worse than this! Nothing can be worse than this says the man.
The wife is taken into the operating room. A short time later her doctor appears. He has some bad news. The wife died during the delivery. Nothing can be worse than this! Nothing can be worse than this! says the man.
The doctor tells the man his baby survived. The man is a bit relieved. The doctor tells the man, before we go in there, I need to tell you your baby is deformed. The man says that does not matter to me. I will of course love my baby regardless.
He happens to have a bicycle in the trunk. He gets the wife on the bicycle and a few blocks down the street the bicycle gets a flat. Nothing can be worse than this! Nothing can be worse than this says the man.
The man scoops up his wife and carries her on his back. Just before reaching the hospital doors he trips and falls. Nothing can be worse than this! Nothing can be worse than this says the man.
The wife is taken into the operating room. A short time later her doctor appears. He has some bad news. The wife died during the delivery. Nothing can be worse than this! Nothing can be worse than this! says the man.
The doctor tells the man his baby survived. The man is a bit relieved. The doctor tells the man, before we go in there, I need to tell you your baby is deformed. The man says that does not matter to me. I will of course love my baby regardless.
The man sees a giant eye sitting on the table.
NOTHING CAN BE WORSE THAN THIS NOTHING CAN BE WORSE THAN THIS! says the man.
The doctor says "He's blind".
NOTHING CAN BE WORSE THAN THIS NOTHING CAN BE WORSE THAN THIS! says the man.
The doctor says "He's blind".
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