Spoiler: If you still haven't got it ....

Co is an abbreviation .

And I still don't get it. I read it as such.

 

And I still don't get it. I read it as such.

It's text substitution. Consider the . a macro.

 

It's text substitution. Consider the . a macro.

I guess I am dense.

 

If anyone cares, it was written by Mark Twain.

I care... in fact, I've many of his works and I can't remember reading that paragraph in particular. And I'm afraid to say I don't understand it either.

 

#define . "mpany"

 

Sort of what I figured

I get dompany, I don't get the thompany.


A man hired by John Smith and Company
Loudly declared he would thompany
Man that he saw
Dumping dirt near his store,
The drivers, therefore, didn't dompany

 

Was old Sam smoking crack when he wrote this?

 

Company
Thump Any
Dump Any

 

He was smoking crack that night.

 

There once was a woman from Prat
She had 3 sons, Nat, Pat and Tat
It was fun in the breeding but not in the feeding
For there was no tit for tat.

 

<Groan>

 

There was a young fellow named Hall
Who fell in the spring in the fall
'Twould have been a sad thing
Had he died in the spring,
But he didn't -- he died in the fall

 

There was a young girl named Ann Heuser
Who swore that no man could surprise her.
But Pabst took a chance,
Found a Schlitz in her pants,
And now she is sadder Budweiser.

 

a dozen, a gross and a score
plus three times the square root of four
divided by seven
plus five times eleven
is nine squared and not a bit more

 

There once was a woman from Prat
She had 3 sons, Nat, Pat and Tat
It was fun in the breeding but not in the feeding
For there was no tit for tat.

The first time I heard this was probably about 20 years ago and I distinctly remember the event. Several members of our group were gathered on a sidewalk in Annapolis. I could probably even point out the building. We were there for one of our regular sailing weekends. For whatever reason one of the group decided to recite this limerick. A few people that happened to be walking by actually stopped to listen. It was very bizarre.

 

A Little Christmas Story

When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.

Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered. Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drunk all the cider and hidden the liquor. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.

Just then the doorbell rang, and an irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'

And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

 

Let's see if Joey gets this one!
There was a young curate of Salisbury
Whose manners were Halisbury-Scalisbury.
He wandered round Hampshire
Without any pampshire
Till the Vicar compelled him to Walisbury

 

Let's see if Joey gets this one!
There was a young curate of Salisbury
Whose manners were Halisbury-Scalisbury.
He wandered round Hampshire
Without any pampshire
Till the Vicar compelled him to Walisbury

No. I don't watch nearly enough PBS. I imagine, though, that it is a play on the Queen's English.

Here's a play on American crudeness:

There was a young lady from Bude,
Who went for a swim in the lake.
A man in a punt,
Stuck a pole in her ear,
And said “you can’t swim here, it’s private”

Mods: permission granted in advance to delete if it is too rich for local consumption.

 

No. I don't watch nearly enough PBS. I imagine, though, that it is a play on the Queen's English.

Here's a play on American crudeness:

There was a young lady from Bude,
Who went for a swim in the lake.
A man in a punt,
Stuck a pole in her ear,
And said “you can’t swim here, it’s private”

Mods: permission granted in advance to delete if it is too rich for local consumption.

Wow, I assume you'll be starting with the Nantucket portfolio after the intermission?

 

Wow, I assume you'll be starting with the Nantucket portfolio after the intermission?

How does one have a comprehensive discussion about limericks without eventually going there?

There must be a law parallel to Godwin's for this.