Hey, thats’s my song!

 

Hey, thats’s my song!

Which you? Bob or Freddie at the Halloween party?

 

It wasn't a Halloween party. It is at my dance studio where we were doing a dress rehearsal for our 2022 dance showcase to the song “Killer Queen.”. So, to answer your question, it is the Freddie who was the character I was cosplaying in my dance routine.

 

An old man calls his son and says, "Listen, your mother and I are getting divorced. Forty-five years of misery is enough." "Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams. “We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,” he says. "I'm sick of her face, and I'm sick of talking about this, so call your sister and tell her," and he hangs up. Now, the son is worried. He calls his sister. She says, "Like hell they’re getting divorced!" She calls their father immediately. "You’re not getting divorced! Don't do another thing. The two of us are flying home tomorrow to talk about this. Until then, don't call a lawyer, don't file a paper. DO YOU HEAR ME?” She hangs up the phone. The old man turns to his wife and says, "Okay, they’re both coming for Christmas and paying their own airfares.

 

Groans expected:

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Karma - when you think you're pulling something over on another person:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/rKaHilSJGsg

 

Not exactly a joke but, my cousin stops by her dad's house at least every other day - he's 98-year-old. He finally started talking about "the end". He decided he wants to be cremated. His daughter (my cousin) asked what she's supposed to do with the ashes. He said to spread them at the local Kroger's parking lot - that way she'll visit him at least once a week. She was really offended.

 

Not exactly a joke but, my cousin stops by her dad's house at least every other day - he's 98-year-old. He finally started talking about "the end". He decided he wants to be cremated. His daughter (my cousin) asked what she's supposed to do with the ashes. He said to spread them at the local Kroger's parking lot - that way she'll visit him at least once a week. She was really offended.

Also, my cousin eventually asked if he was serious. She said "you bought the plot next to mom, don't you want to be there?." He replied, "She hasn't seen me in 35-years, I'm pretty sure she's moved on". This guy either turned into a standup comic in his 90s, he had a major epiphany or he has dementia.

 

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When try to understand future's generation but it's pointless...

 

 

 

An old Christmas joke you may or may not remember:
https://forum.allaboutcircuits.com/threads/the-jokes-thread.60389/page-14#post-555843

[IMG alt="Wendy"]https://forum.allaboutcircuits.com/data/avatars/m/19/19834.jpg?1670643273[/IMG]

On Christmas Eve a tired engineer realized to his dismay he had forgotten to get his wife a Christmas gift.

He frantically scanned the stores, and saw a pet store that hadn't closed its doors yet.

He went in and explained his predicament. The clerk thought about it for a minute, and explained they had pretty much been cleared out, except for a little parakeet named Chet. "I don't know why he hasn't sold", the clerk explained, "He does some nice Christmas tricks".

The engineer expressed interest, so the clerk took him to a little bird in his cage. He lite a match, and held it well under his left foot.

Chet burst into song, "Silent Night! Holy Night!" and sang the whole song through.

Then the clerk lite another match, and held it well under his right foot.

"Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the Way!", and sang it all the way through.

The customer was very pleased, and bought Chet and all the accessories he needed.

Later, his happy wife and man were laying in front of the fire drinking their egg nogg looking up at their new pet, and his wife asked, "What happens if you hold the match between his legs?"

"I don't know", the engineer said, and tried the experiment forthwith.

Silence.

"Chet's nuts roasting on an open fire..."

 

I got my bachelor degree in electrical engineering when I was woolgathering about inventing a lamp to light up the world just like Edison...
Until a pal offered me to keep my master's in biomedical bias...now I'm just thinking about a botton to turn the whole thing off like Darwin. :--P

 

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And his robotic dog leaves him...
Then he'll only be able to sing about crying in his beer. But since kids aren't drinking much beer he'll need some way to rhyme lyrics with "white claw" or "edibles".

 

A neo-nazi cat looking for its medal of honor after Cold War No 10^15+1... :--p

 

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View attachment 282847​

Fine. How about Pantera?