that went right over my head.

Planes usually do.

I think it was a short plane for a shortbus.

Yup!

 

 

Planes usually do.

Yup!

I was thinking of why a defiantly photo shopped video was directed to me.

 

An Airbus 380 is on its way across the Atlantic. It flies consistently at 800 km/h at 30,000 feet, when suddenly a Eurofighter with a Tempo Mach 2 appears.
The pilot of the fighter jet slows down, flies alongside the Airbus and greets the pilot of the passenger plane by radio: "Airbus, boring flight isn’t it? Now have a look here!"
He rolls his jet on its back, accelerates, breaks through the sound barrier, rises rapidly to a dizzying height, and then swoops down almost to sea level in a breathtaking dive. He loops back next to the Airbus and asks: "Well, how was that?"
The Airbus pilot answers: "Very impressive, but watch this!"
The jet pilot watches the Airbus, but nothing happens. It continues to fly straight, at the same speed. After 15 minutes, the Airbus pilot radios, "Well, how was that?
Confused, the jet pilot asks, "What did you do?"
The AirBus pilot laughs and says: "I got up, stretched my legs, walked to the back of the aircraft to use the washroom, then got a cup of coffee and a chocolate fudge pastry."
The moral of the story is: When you’re young, speed and adrenaline seems to be great. But as you get older and wiser, you learn that comfort and peace are more important.

 

I was thinking of why a defiantly photo shopped video was directed to me.

Saw the odd video and the short plane and thought about your other avatar, that short bus you've posted in the past.

Definitely not directed at you with any kind of malice. Just thought you of all people would get a kick out of it. Shorty.

 

Two older ladies are sitting on a park bench smoking cigarettes when it starts to rain.
One of the ladies reaches into her purse and pulls out a condom.
"Helen, what in the world is that for?" says the other woman.
"Well, watch this" says Helen as she cuts off the end and puts it over her cigarette.
"This way they don't get soggy."
The second lady is pretty impressed and walks down to the corner store and into the condom section.
The teenage clerk asks "Can I help you with something?"
"Well, yes, I'm looking for a pack of condoms."
The clerk says "They come in a variety of sizes. What size are you looking for?"
She answers "Oh, just big enough to fit a camel."

 

Definitely not directed at you with any kind of malice

Knew that and never took it that way.

 

​

 

 

...anything thing?

 

I recognize that as a Steven Wright joke.

My favorite of his:

I got home last night and found that everything in my apartment had been replaced by an identical copy. Then my roommate walked up and I said, “Look! Everything has been replaced by an identical copy.” He said, “Who are you?”

 

• Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave the house.
• It’s weird being the same age as old people.
• When I was a kid I wanted to be older…this is not what I expected.
• Chocolate is God’s way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby.
• It’s probably my age that tricks people into thinking I’m an adult.
• Never sing in the shower! Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping, and slipping leads to paramedics seeing you naked. So remember…Don’t sing!
• I see pictures on Facebook of people my age mountain climbing; I feel good getting my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.
• If you can’t think of a word say “I forgot the English word for it.” That way people will think you’re bilingual instead of an idiot.
• I’m at a place in my life where errands are starting to count as going out.
• I’m at that age where my mind still thinks I’m 29, my humor suggests I’m 12, while my body mostly keeps asking if I’m sure I’m not dead yet.
• I don’t always go the extra mile, but when I do it’s because I missed my exit.
• You don’t realize how old you are until you sit on the floor and then try to get back up.
• We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

 

​

 

My therapist told me, "write letters to all the people you hate and then burn them."

Did that, but now I don't know what to do with all the letters.

 

View attachment 281041​

I resemble that remark.

 

No sense in being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway.

 

I feel good getting my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Me too.

You don’t realize how old you are until you sit on the floor and then try to get back up.

AMEN!

 

One legged man plays soccer. (warning, someone in the crowd swears "Am I F—— STUPID?!")
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/Y2FJLkxKcRc

 

This is the one I relate to:

• It’s weird being the same age as old people.

 

Easy math
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/GIOi10E63iQ