Alliteration will never hurt you.

Alloteration will.

 

OK, for those of you who may be offended by displays of the middle finger - don't watch this video. It IS an April Fools joke and I got a kick out of it. There are some swearing and bleeping of words in the video.

 

 

 

Now THIS is thinking ahead!

 

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No justice, no cheese.

 

 

 

 

A priest, an imam, and a rabbit enter a blood bank to donate. The receiving nurse asks for their blood type:

- I am a type-A, says the priest.

- I know I am type-B, says the imam.

The rabbit looks a bit lost and finally stammers:

- I think … I think … I am a type-O

 

 

 

I just realized I don't really know s**t about genealogy ...

 

 

 

Physics Jokes:

• Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired.
• Heisenberg walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders another beer. Orders a third beer. The bartender says, "Hey, you're getting a bit ahead of yourself there!" Heisenberg replies, "No, no, I'm not. I can't know both my position and momentum at the same time!"
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! (pronounced "Fshhh")

 

Math Jokes:

• Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
• A mathematician is walking down the road and comes across a convenience store. He peeks inside and sees a sign that reads "Buy 1 get 1 free!" He enters the store, grabs a loaf of bread, and goes to the counter. The cashier rings him up and says, "That'll be $2.50." The mathematician looks confused and says, "But the sign says buy 1 get 1 free!" The cashier replies, "Well, that's one free for me."
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.

 

Electronics Jokes:

• Did you hear about the resistor who blew up? He couldn't handle the current situation.
• A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for books about paranoia. The librarian whispers, "They're right behind you!"
• Why did the optometrist flunk his driving test? Because he couldn't see around corners!