Two men go visit a prostitute. The first man goes into the bedroom. Comes out 10 minutes later and says:
"Heck! My wife is better than that."
The second man goes in. He comes out 10 minutes later and says:
"Yes, I agree. She IS better."

 

What should he have done?
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/_ypXYJrb_ew

 

Back halfway off.

Make sure the parking brake was set on the truck?

 

What'chu thinkin?
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/PkBvrM_qdGY

 

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Don't be disappointed at the outcome:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UxkpgaMzCVg

 

A man boards a flight to discover that the seat next to him is occupied by a parrot.

When the steward comes around for beverage service, the man asks for a bottle of whiskey, but before he can reach for it, the parrot yells, "Hey, you stupid &$%*@, I want a beer. Now!". Startled, the steward forgets about the man's order and goes and gets a beer for the parrot. Taking his cue from the parrot, the man then hollers, "Look, you @(&%$, I asked for a whiskey and I demand you get it for me right this minute!" The surrounding passengers figure that enough is enough and soon both the man and the parrot are thrown out of the plane by force.

As they are falling, the parrot looks over at the man and says, "You know, for someone that can't fly, you sure are a mouthy &$&!#@."

 

When Siri goes bad.
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/x4Nn9BHVw9Y

 

 

View attachment 289411

Speaking of which, here's a very interesting article about the languages that are usually spoken the fastest. Spanish is an extremely close second to Japanese, which is first.

 

View attachment 289411

Assuming sail and sale are homophonic with seal (many foreigners cannot detect the distinction), broad new possibilities open up.

 

Assuming sail and sale are homophonic with seal (many foreigners cannot detect the distinction), broad new possibilities open up.

Many Americans can't tell the difference between "Then" and "Than". I see that one misused time and again.

 

With my jungle tongue I cannot pronounce bair, bear, bare, beer any differently.
Whenever I say, "Gimme a bair, please" they should know what I want!

 

"Bair"? A basket of air?

 

Many Americans can't tell the difference between "Then" and "Than".

Many idiots can't tell the difference between "arse" and "elbow".

 

What riles me up is people that can't tell the difference between affect and effect.

 

What riles me up is people that can't tell the difference between affect and effect.

That one gets me and I always see it when someone else does it. But I'll still get it wrong myself. Their, there, and there are another one I'll get wrong despite knowing better AND watching myself to be careful. It's almost like worrying about falling while skiing - the more you worry, the more likely a fall.

 

That one gets me and I always see it when someone else does it. But I'll still get it wrong myself. Their, there, and there are another one I'll get wrong despite knowing better AND watching myself to be careful. It's almost like worrying about falling while skiing - the more you worry, the more likely a fall.

... and don't get me started on the faults often committed by people that speak my own language ...