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panic mode
- Joined Oct 10, 2011
- 5,013
The Jokes thread
- Thread starter R!f@@
- Start date
panic mode
- Joined Oct 10, 2011
- 5,013
panic mode
- Joined Oct 10, 2011
- 5,013
WOW! That must be some HOT sand. She's standing on her toes.
panic mode
- Joined Oct 10, 2011
- 5,013
hmmmm....
i
i
panic mode
- Joined Oct 10, 2011
- 5,013
i would expect something along the lines ".. with a gift" but i guess someone wanted people to wonder
In a convent in Ireland , the 98-year-old Mother Superior lay dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable. They tried giving her warm milk to drink but she refused it.
One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen. Then, remembering a bottle of Irish Whiskey that had been received as a gift the previous
Christmas, she opened it and poured a generous amount into the warm milk. Back at Mother Superior's bed, they held the glass to her lips. The frail Nun drank a little, then a little more and before they knew it, she had finished the whole glass down to the last drop.
As her eyes brightened, the nuns thought it would be a good opportunity to have one last talk with their spiritual leader.
"Mother," the nuns asked earnestly, "Please give us some of your wisdom before you leave us"
She raised herself up in bed on one elbow, looked at them and said: "
"DON'T SELL THAT COW."
One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen. Then, remembering a bottle of Irish Whiskey that had been received as a gift the previous
Christmas, she opened it and poured a generous amount into the warm milk. Back at Mother Superior's bed, they held the glass to her lips. The frail Nun drank a little, then a little more and before they knew it, she had finished the whole glass down to the last drop.
As her eyes brightened, the nuns thought it would be a good opportunity to have one last talk with their spiritual leader.
"Mother," the nuns asked earnestly, "Please give us some of your wisdom before you leave us"
She raised herself up in bed on one elbow, looked at them and said: "
"DON'T SELL THAT COW."
Just don't turn out the lights and everything will be fine.
panic mode
- Joined Oct 10, 2011
- 5,013
well, then you better not look at the price tag of what she wants.... 
Do you really talk about your wife that way?
Delta Prime
- Joined Nov 15, 2019
- 1,311
Marriage is when a man and woman become one.
The trouble starts when they try to decide which one
The trouble starts when they try to decide which one
Are you living in the 1990s?
Actually, no. I'm referring to a commercial from back in the 70's or 80's. Ghallager (the comedian) made light of the boyfriend giving his girl a watch and she says "I wanted a Longines". Then he went on to say - quoted above.
HOWEVER: My wife IS prone to buying me watches.
I don't know why. I'm never late. She's the one who's late all the time. If we have somewhere to be at a certain time, and it can take 20 minutes to get there, and that's just to GET there, we're out the door with 15 minutes to arrive. We're always late. 
Confused about the food chain in Australia? It apparently goes counter-clockwise.
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