For me Hydrocodone its side effect of constipation has had me to a doc for pain management.

My heart goes out to you as I have played that game. Following major surgery a few years ago, actually about 4 years ago I was prescribed hydrocodone for pain. I was also prescribed a laxative and the subsequent balancing act was interesting to say the least.

Ron

 

Interesting is an interesting word for it now I can focus on physical therapy The experience was distracting to say the least.

 

I hate being negative all the time. I've been pretty sick lately so I shut down for a while. I was at the PT(physical therapist today,She had me standing between parallel bars on both feet. I threw up later not a bad thing since every time I use new muscles differently it happens. She was working harder than I was try to keep my bad left leg straight,Not a major break through, but will take what comes my way. But for a short while before I abused their trash can(again)I was standing up and swaying between feet. Using my good arm (for balance and good leg to stand between the bars. First time I've been on both feet in literally years When I address my urinary infection causing a hell of a lot of pain I will be making serious progress.

 

Wendy:
Always good to hear from you. Of course, any progress is good.

Hang in there!!!!

 

(Some text removed for clarity)
First time I've been on both feet in literally years .

Not a major breakthrough? This sounds like significant progress and is very encouraging. I hope your physical therapy gets you walking about soon (relative term).

 

I hate being negative all the time. I've been pretty sick lately so I shut down for a while. I was at the PT(physical therapist today,She had me standing between parallel bars on both feet.

You have come a heck of a long way since this all began and while you still have a way to go your progress has been remarkable. Baby steps but baby steps is what it takes. PT is not fun but getting up on the parallel bars and even managing to support yourself is a major step. Time, patience and obviously hard work which you have been giving all three will get you through all of this. Just keep at it. You are doing fine.

Ron

 

Good news and bad news:

The good news is I've finally made it to the brighter side of a killer depression. The kind that is life threatening. Part of it is the isolation and the loneliness. I stay desperate for someone, anyone to talk too. The good news is Part of how I beat it. Some of what physical therapy is doing can seem silly, but I can feel it working. while I am nowhere close to walking, I can see a light and it doesn't have a train whistle. The bad news is the depression keeps coming back, but I fight it however I can. I have several articles/projects more than half finished, with the artwork finished, I just need to write the text The art schematics, layout take a long time but are fun to do. This may sound conceited I usually am pretty sure a design will work before I build it if it doesn't it is icing on the cake, I learn something new.

If you are in the United states and want to talk send me a PM we can trade phone numbers and talk, I'll try not to chew your ear off.

I am down to 154 pounds, maybe less, I used to eat when I got depressed, apparently not any more.

 

Depression is one of those things which is difficult, putting it lightly, to overcome. I only know what I read and what I have witnessed in friends but never having experienced depression first hand I am at a loss. Easy to say take a pill and call me in the morning. I am obviously not you but having followed things along I can make a suggestion. Go back to the beginning of all of your problems. Now benchmark your progress every step of the journey it has been. You have really made some incredible progress, think about it. That progress is what is important and there are some stellar benchmarks in there. Those accomplishments alone need to be used as a weapon against letting depression set in. Focus on all of the good. Setbacks are normal, you don't win them all but as long as you win more than lose there is progress. Win a few & lose a few but you are winning more than you lose and that is reason, and damn good reason to be happy and not depressed. Just keep hanging tight and tough.

Ron

 

If you have Skype (and I am not sure what else is available no PC's these days) you can talk to people all over the world. Get Skype and send me a PM.

 

Lord have mercy have I been down. So down I have asked for a referral to a shrink. I've also stopped eating, my weight has dropped to146 lbs, pretty weird for someone who has been obese most of my life, I started at 276. My weight when I had the stroke was 190 and probably contributed to the stroke. I am fighting the depression every way I can. Even the weight loss can be considered a positive if viewed in a certain light. You won't be breaking in a new moderator any time soon this I promise. They are talking about starting new treatments, How Botox is supposed to help with paralysis I have not a clue.

I found myself redesigning a circuit verbatim I did several years ago, also found interesting bug in the forum software. Has to do with the transition from Vbulliten to xeno. Probably a database glitch, jeez I am an old broad. I've been here for 10 years.

 

Hello Wendy,

About wich thread are you talking about?
I think there might be a glitch from the conversion from http to https.
Images in old thread with the http will show as a broken image.
When you change the http to https the image will show in the thread again.

Bertus

 

i was searching through my old posts there seem to be a dead zone where I cannot go, I research it a bit more and present better data.

 

I am fighting the depression every way I can. You won't be breaking in a new moderator any time soon this I promise. They are talking about starting new treatments, How Botox is supposed to help with paralysis I have not a clue.

Depression is a hard one to work through. Do get whatever help it takes. _Please_.

At least you are still looking toward the future. We would hate to lose you here.

 

@Wendy
I just saw a report on the use of transcranial magnetic stimulation for stroke rehab. It looks real promising.

This search turns up a lot of interesting hits:
https://www.google.com/search?q=tra...ke+rehab&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-b-1

 

I have started using the techniques taught me by my councilor I used to help me with my transition, I am glad to say they worked in this case too. It is interesting to me as my mood has improved so has my mental acuity. It is nice to have a working brain again.

I got up and voted today. I have gotten physically stronger to the point where a 70 year old transwoman (t-woman for short) who has never had HRT( Hormone Replacement Therapy) and still has her man strength Estrogen melts muscles I have to admit her age has motivated me to build my strength to the point where she was able to help me into the car. It was still physically challenging. I threw up on the sidewalk three times on the way home. When I got back to bed I was exhausted. It was totally worth it. It helped me feel good about myself. Looking at the positives in my life it became part of them. It seems slow sometimes but I am getting better.When I came home from the stroke from the hospital my son in law picked up my 190 pounds in his arm and put me in the car, doing the same to get me back in the wheelchair when I got home, He still blushes when I call him my hero.I felt nauseous then too.

 

Step by step and believe me your mental attitude will follow along. Congratulations on today's accomplishments.

Ron

 

 

My last PT appointment went very well, When I first met Grace. my Therapist she was very guarded in telling my I could be successfully treated.Now she tells me I am making decent headway, My current attitude is very positive as I am successfully fighting depression.

 

Am I insane?
I had this thought when I woke up just before sunrise and let it peculate a while before writing this post. Welcome to my blog. I trust the other moderators will keep me in line?

I would challenge anyone to go through what I am and not change. Of course some people would argue being transgender is insane. Personally I view it as a rare birth defect, one would I wish on no one.

I started this thread to keep my brand of craziness in one place and not splatter it across the board, I looked for years to find a site like this and am overjoyed that they allow me to help out around here. I try not to abuse the privilege, fact is I love interacting with people. So I track threads I enjoy and watch the ones I must. AAC really is one of my duties, one that I think keep my sane. It is an ideal fit for me as I am an electronics nut (oops, did I say that out loud?) and a science buff, AAC is a perfect fit for me.

I also write short stories for another site. I will not inflict them on anyone here but if anyone is interested I will send a link to my index via PM.

Depression is going to be a forever problem for me, my coping mechanisms still seem to be working.

 

Depression is going to be a forever problem for me, my coping mechanisms still seem to be working.

Happy to hear that.

We all need my sig from time to time.