The Iron Chef

Thread Starter


Joined Jul 1, 2008
After reading "How are double sided pcb's soldered in a reflow oven?"
I felt compelled to post a short compilation of quotes from my wife.

Quotes from my bride:
"How would you like it if I used your table saw as a cutting board?!"

"And now we're supposed to eat off of that?"

"You might as well hang that thing in your shop because we ain't ever eating off of it again!"

"You have your own workbench. ... Why is your oscilloscope and this other stuff on our kitchen table?"

"You're going to do what with the grill?... When you're done you might as well roll it out to the curb!"

"What is this thing, that looks like a black bug with lots of legs and pointy feet? I pulled it out of my foot!!!"

Wood Shop:
Wife: "Why are there Acacia logs in microwave?"
Me: "I'm accelerating drying and killing any critters and larvae that might be in there.... It's pure genius!"
Wife: Absolute silence. Women can convey discontent with a mere facial expression more effectively than verbally.

Wife: "You're a genius alright... It's been three weeks now and everything that comes out of the micro smells like those <snip> logs"!!!!
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Joined Feb 5, 2010
Your wife was never cloned by any chance, was she? Or perhaps women have a special class in school where they all learn these 'special' quotes?


Joined Dec 26, 2010
I've more or less given up building things because smaller and smaller parts present too much of a challenge to my declining eyesight and dexterity. Clearly younger folk have keener faculties, but I never imagined that anyone would try to hand-craft surface mount boards at home, using kitchen implements (and still I wonder if someone is pulling our legs here). However, given that these new recipes now seem to be on the menu, perhaps we need to adapt out kitchen equipment to suit, and at the same time adopt more food-friendly designs. Here are a few less serious suggestions.

1) This would be a good time to get to grips with lead-free solder, unless someone is trying to collect on the life insurance.
2) Similarly, highly toxic fluxes are normally to be avoided. Could there be a business opportunity for making flavoured varieties?
3) Avoid alcohol-based fluxes when using a gas hob, unless you are following a "carte flambée" recipe.
5) Actually, French cuisine isn't all it's cracked up to be. I once tried "redresseurs au sélénium grillés, but it had far too much garlic.
6) Standard skillets or pizza pans may be best if you are making boards for a rocket, otherwise look for square ones.
7) If a colleague invites you round to share a meal, think twice about it.
8) Don't try to solder PBAs in the microwave oven.
9) If your board comes out a little overdone, swap out any totally fried parts and add conformal coat.
10) A similar technique can be applied to steaks and burgers, but the flavour is better if you use gravy instead.
11) If you could obtain some of the adhesive gravy once served in certain UK institutions, this could be used for 9), or at a pinch for 10).


Joined Jul 7, 2009
Its called 'Marriage FINISHING School" ;)
Bzzzzt! Wrong! It's called "Marriage -- and you're finished." :p

My last fiasco was using SWMBO's oven to dry out a PC keyboard that had a touch of liquid spill. I put it on the lowest temperature and set it on the rack for an hour or so. Alas, when I took it out, the ends had softened enough to sag through the rack wires, ruining the keyboard. SWMBO communicated quite effectively with just a look...