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someonesdad

Joined Jul 7, 2009
1,583
Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

There is a great need for "sarcasm" font.

Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and realize that I had no idea what was going on when I first saw it.

I would rather try to carry five plastic bags full of groceries in each hand than make two trips to bring the groceries in.

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

Was learning to write in cursive really necessary?!?

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Drivers, stay strong out there!

MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood . . . and even out of town.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they had to tell you how the person died.

Bad decisions make good stories..

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection again!

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I didn't make any changes to.

I hate it when I just miss a call by the last ring ("Hello? Hello? Dammit!"), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn't answer . . drop the phone and run away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste!

It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

I think that if, years down the road, I find out that I'm sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in high school and college.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket or purse or, perhaps, pinning the tail on the donkey. But, I'd bet that everyone can find and push the snooze button on their bedroom alarm clock from 3 feet away . . . in about 1.7 seconds . . . with your eyes closed . . . first time, every time.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet that, on any given Friday or Saturday night, more kisses begin with Miller Lite than with Kay.
 

RiJoRI

Joined Aug 15, 2007
536
"MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood . . . and even out of town."

When I lived in Massapequa, Mapquest was certain that I lived on the other side of the local highway. Its directions to leave my heighborhood would have put me at the end of my dead-end street!

--Rich
 
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