A Christmas present for Ratch

Thread Starter

studiot

Joined Nov 9, 2007
4,998
I thought we could all collect a compendium of odds, bobs, misnomers and words taken out of context.

We could then replace all the bad jokes in our Christmas crackers with these and have a good laugh this year.

So to kick off

My local disco illuminates their dancefloor with 'blacklight bulbs'

Has anyone seen an open circuit? Is this not a contradiction in terms?
 

KL7AJ

Joined Nov 4, 2008
2,229
Outductance: What comes out the bottom end of an inductor.

Ground bus: Aren't they all?

Transbrother: Complement of a transistor.

Complementary/symmetry: Brown-nosers on both sides.

Foster-Seely Includer: Politically correct FM detector.

Demodulator: What comes after de R.F. amplifier.

Jack: What you plug into a Jill

Infinite Baffle: Trying to figure out Laplace Transforms

Triode: Bad attempt at poetry

Semiconductor: Hi falutin' truck driver

CMOS: What happens when you forget to clean your aquarium

Frequency: Quency you don't have to pay for.
 

thingmaker3

Joined May 16, 2005
5,083
Where can I find some mortar for my IGBT bricks?

How many millimeters of band-width do I need for a ring?

If resistance is futile, conductance is fruitful.

To calculate the transfer function of a transistor transconductance in series with a transformer, would I have to go into a trance?

If I unwind a transformer, am I a trans-unformer?
 

Thread Starter

studiot

Joined Nov 9, 2007
4,998
Yes we all want to enjoy this thread, including Ratch who bespake many wise utterings in this forum including pointing out the incongruity of phrases like AC current...

There are enough good non-personal jokes about.
 

Wendy

Joined Mar 24, 2008
23,408
Being able to laugh at yourself is a good thing, Lord knows I've done my share of boners. Mine tends to be "The Simpson's" moments, DOH!

Did you know caps make good stink bombs?
 

thingmaker3

Joined May 16, 2005
5,083
On the first day of Christmas, my EE gave to me:
An inrush current through a diode tree.

On the second day of Christmas, my EE gave to me:
Two current paths,
And an inrush current through a diode tree.

On the third day of Christmas, my EE gave to me:
Three state logic,
Two current paths,
And an inrush current through a diode tree.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my EE gave to me:
Four tetrode tubes,
Three state logic,
Two current paths,
And an inrush current through a diode tree.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my EE gave to me:
FIVE TOKEN RINGS!
Four tetrode tubes,
Three state logic,
Two current paths,
And an inrush current through a diode tree.
 

beenthere

Joined Apr 20, 2004
15,819
Six carpals tunneling,
Seven heptodes oscillating,
Eight octals socketing,
Nine RGB pins a pinning,
Ten binary coded decimals,
Eleven 3PDT relays clacking,
Twelve positions rotating.
 

floomdoggle

Joined Sep 1, 2008
217
Ratch,
Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. You see, you got your wish. Your present from AAC. You now have a song about you. (However, carpal tunnels is odd.)
And to you and all of yours, a very merry Christmas.
And to all of AAC, Merry Christmas. To our non-Christmassy friends, be merry on this season, and carry this feeling on toward the rest of the year.
As always, thanks for having me. It is appreciated.
Dan
 

Ratch

Joined Mar 20, 2007
1,070
floomdoggle,

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.
My name is not Virgina.

You see, you got your wish. Your present from AAC. You now have a song about you. (However, carpal tunnels is odd.)
Not a song, a thread. My name is not mentioned in the song. Do you know what a carpal tunnel is?

And to you and all of yours, a very merry Christmas.
Bah! Humbug!

Ratch
 
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