Being a Government Employee -- Anonymous

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has always prided its self on the amount of SHIT it gives our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your Congressional Representative,
who has been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.

Sincerely,

The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)

John

 

Nice old joke ... It is a derivitive of a joke I saw 40 years ago during the 1982 Reduction In Force.

 

I was involved with infectious diseases in the 80's and there were lots of jokes going around about Herpes and AIDS, but this one didn't make it to me. I thought the acronyms were clever. Thanks for the history.

John

 

If it was intended to be clever or funny, why wasn't it put in the jokes thread?

 

Thank you for your righteous concern.
1) It's not a knee slapper
2) It is more in line with some of the current political discussions in OT (i.e., satire)

John

 

1) It's not a knee slapper

That doesn't prevent anyone else from appending that thread. You should let people know that is a criteria for posti there.

2) It is more in line with some of the current political discussions in OT (i.e., satire)

The truth of your satire is as truthful as many posts in the political thread with most of the traction - you could have put it there too.